Loner Magazine - Lonely Sofa

Lonely Sofa

Name: Alice

Last seen: Trying to smuggle a case of Two Buck Chuck (White Zinfandel) out of Trader Joe’s

Occupation: Sells handmade sweaters for ferrets on etsy

Interests: Her ferret named Mistletoe, buying in bulk and Twilight fan fiction

Last items found between cushions: Ferret poop and a corkscrew